Decide
to change
In this article that I have the
opportunity to share on Everlaab, I will touch on the subject of
decision-making.
By the way, my name is Julien, I am
the founder of the personal development site Dev-Perso and creator of
educational and inspiring content. I know the subject of decision making, I
myself had faced it.
The decision is a key step in
change and that is what we will talk about in this article. Indeed, change is a
word that can be scary, but in reality, it invites us to evolve and create the
person we want to be, to have the life we aspire to, and to achieve our
aspirations.
Change is therefore a good thing if
we undertake it (vs. if we undergo it…). To do this, you have to make THE
decision that can change everything.
Let's see why deciding to change is
important, also how that decision-making takes place. Finally, we will also see
tips to further anchor this decision so that it bears fruit.
What
is decision-making?
First, let's define what is meant
by the term “decision making”. Decision-making is action. Indeed, the word
"prize", derived from the verb to take, reminds us of the active
character of the term. What this means is that decision-making is not a simple
wish or desire to change. It is an action that marks a caesura, or a pivot
between two situations (the one before the decision was taken and the one
after). Thus, decision-making is already a matter of action and therefore
requires real motivation on our part.
In addition, decision-making is a
commitment. Indeed, when we make a decision and do it sincerely and seriously,
we are committed. Therefore, deciding to change is a real commitment to
oneself.
The greater the commitment and
involvement on our part, the greater the actions and changes will also be.
Quite often there is a correlation.
Thus, a great involvement will
generate actions accordingly and therefore results as well.
Why
decide to change?
Why do we have to make a decision,
or even make THE decision to change? After all, what makes us want to change so
much that we make a firm decision and commit?
There can be a lot of reasons that
push us to make this decision, but often these reasons all have one thing in
common: suffering.
The term suffering may be a bit
heavy for some, so we can reclassify it as pain, grief, dissatisfaction, or
even frustration.
Either way, we all seek to thrive
and be happy, but the human experience we go through takes us through different
emotional states. Indeed, according to our course, we know ups and downs and we
advance in our way of life.
The problem arises when there is
such a gap between our external situation and our internal state that we no longer
accept certain things. Thus, it can be a toxic relationship that harms us, a
job that we hate, discomfort or a complex that demeans us, a precarious
financial situation that tires us… etc. The point is, something is wrong and it
hurts us to the point of non-acceptance. At this point, it is necessary to
decide to change!
The
brakes on decision-making
How is it when some people are
struggling to make up their minds? Why don't some people decide to change their
condition?
There are several reasons for this.
First of all, deciding to change requires being aware of the situation in which
you find yourself, and being able to change it. For some, this awareness has
not happened. Awareness is another important step, which we will not be able to
detail too much here, because it is not the object of the article.
On the other hand, what can be said
about awareness is that it serves as fertile ground for decision-making. It
precedes decision-making. If awareness has not taken place, it is difficult to
undertake serious and committed decision-making.
What about when awareness has
indeed taken place, but decision-making is struggling to emerge?
This is another case in which the
brakes and blockages are psychological. This means that we break ourselves and
we limit ourselves.
Deciding to change takes will,
courage, and confidence. To go a little further, we could say that deciding to
change also requires faith and hope. Indeed, we must believe that we can change
and create a better situation. Thus, if we are subject to fear, we risk
delaying this decision-making.
There are several types of fears.
Here, fear of commitment or fear of the unknown can prevent the decision to
change from being made. Therefore, there is personal work to be undertaken to
reduce his fears if they inhibit action. Deciding to change invites us to leave
our comfort zone.
Decide
to change what?
When we are determined to change,
we can ask ourselves the following question: decide to change what? In other
words, what are we going to change in our life? Are we going to change our
lives at all?
Not necessarily. Indeed, we will
explore three avenues of change that are often common. These are profound
changes that first take place on the inside and then manifest themselves on the
outside.
Decide
to change who we are
Deciding to change who you are
doesn't mean changing your identity and reinventing a new story. No, deciding
to change who you mean aspiring to be another person. A lot of times that means
becoming a better person. You could use the expression to become the best
version of yourself. There may come a time in our life when we question
ourselves and consider that we can be more and be better. It's like realizing
that our potential is not being tapped. Usually, deciding to change who you
have involved lifestyle changes.
Decide
to change your lifestyle
Deciding to change your lifestyle
appears as a solution to evolve and take your life to the next level. Indeed,
our way of life is made up of our environment and our daily habits and actions.
In other words, our lifestyle has a direct influence on our current and future
level of development.
Our way of life will guide the
trajectory of our life and therefore will have consequences for our future. For
example, if you are a smoker and you lack breath and energy today, it is
obvious that the situation may get worse over time if you do not change your
lifestyle.
Decide
to change your life
Deciding to change your life is
often misinterpreted. Indeed, we often believe that it means changing
completely and starting from zero on the other side of the world. The reality
is that yes it is part of a life change, but you can decide to change your life
without changing everything.
Decision
making precedes action
Deciding to change is not enough in
itself. Indeed, for changes, whatever they may be, to take place, they must be
undertaken and this can only be done through action. Action is the junction
between your inner world and your outer world. Whatever is in your head can
only come to fruition in your life through action. Taking action is therefore
the way to change, but for it to take place, it must be decided. Thus,
decision-making follows awareness and precedes action.
2
tips to anchor your decision
To decide to change well, and to
anchor that decision, here are two tips you can apply.
Note: Reading these tips is not
enough, you have to apply them to see how effective they are in your life. So,
if you want to decide to change, follow these tips to anchor that decision and
initiate the change you want to see.
Write
your decision making
Writing has many benefits. First of
all, writing allows you to clarify your intention and what you have in mind.
The simple act of writing lightens you up and relieves your mind. So you can
write and describe the situation you want to change. To learn more, you can
write about why you no longer accept this situation. How is this situation
harming you?
Read also: Why and how to document
your decision-making process?
Affirm your decision-making out
loud
Do you know the power of positive
affirmations?
As a reminder, the fact of
affirming an intention and repeating it with sincerity and commitment helps us
to anchor it in our unconscious. In other words, it means that we can increase
our level of involvement through the use of affirmations.
You can do this exercise several
times a day, and for several days until it becomes obvious to you. You don't
have to be in the middle of things and be half-involved if you want to decide
to change. Indeed, if we decide to change, we commit and we implement the
means, otherwise, it is better to wait to be ready.
Real positive change takes place
over time. It is a journey, and this journey is very enriching, but to find out
it is necessary to start with the first step: to make THE decision that can
change everything.